10 Lessons I Learned From My First Private Yoga Student

Kelly was my first private yoga student.

We began our work together at the start of 2020 in her apartment’s gym. For the first few months of the year, we met every Tuesday and Thursday morning, doing our best to find a quiet space in a sea of solopreneurs getting their HIIT’s on while making VERY IMPORTANT phone calls. Let’s just say it wasn’t the most Zen of environments. But true to form, it’s pretty much what you expect if you teach yoga in New York City. I mean, if you aren’t offering savasana to the sweet sounds of the local construction site airhorn, can you even call it yoga?

(That’s a joke).

But seriously, speaking as a Brooklyn-based yoga teacher, you’ve gotta be able to guide your students through many a city distraction, including but not limited to: jack hammering, noisy upstairs neighbors, siren “woop-woops”, tempting café smells, romping children, and horn honkers intent on fucking with your serenity because someone is currently fucking with theirs.

Much like anything I’m new at, I felt the familiar flutter of Imposter Syndrome walking into Kelly’s building those first few weeks. I couldn’t help but ask myself “am I doing this right?”

One of the first things I observed was how much time we spent in conversation during our sessions. Without a frame of reference, I found myself wondering if it was a “normal” part of working 1:1 or if it was unique to our dynamic. At times I worried that it was interrupting her ability to concentrate and draw her attention inwards. “Should I suggest we limit our chats to the start of each sesh?” “Is she getting enough from our time together if we only get through a handful of postures?” “Is it possible I am the worst private yoga teacher EVER?”

I found reassurance in the fact that she kept showing up and renewing her packages. And while I wasn’t yet sure of the impact our work was having, my intuition kept reassuring me that creating space for her to talk and for me to listen was an important part of her journey.

I came to accept our conversation as an integral part of her practice; another method of moving energy through the mindbody. Another entry point for healing.

In contrast to how I would prepare for a studio class, with private yoga I soon realized I had to throw my precious plans and rulebooks out the window and start from a wildly different, much more flexible place. The less I planned, the more I was able to give. Over time I learned to trust my instincts, that the best thing I could do to prepare for our sessions was to show up as my most present and curious self. I got better at asking questions, listening deeply, and trusting my intuition, and in return I watched our practice expand.

When you are working 1:1, it’s just the two of you (or sometimes it’s the two of you + the morning gym crowd) responding to one another’s energy. The practice feels more like an improvisational dance than a rehearsed performance.

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I missed the mark. One morning Kelly showed up pretty low energy and I remember thinking to myself what she needed was to get her body moving, working hard, and feeling strong. So I pushed, only to get halfway through our session before seeing all over her face what she really needed; permission to rest. In that moment my work became surrendering to to what was right in front of me. It was a practice of non-attachment in action. Moments later Kelly was propped up on a castle of bolsters and blocks, snugged in blankets, and we spent the remainder of our time together exploring what was weighing on her mind. That was her yoga that day. And it was enough.

When March 2020 happened and the world flipped upside down, we were still just a few months into our work together. Up until this point, our sessions had been in-person at her gym and I wasn’t sure she’d be up for shifting to a virtual practice with me. (For that matter, I wasn’t sure how I felt about teaching virtually.) But we decided to give it a shot and I’m so glad we did. The transformative effects of virtual private yoga took us both by surprise and were truly a silver lining in what were uncertain times.

As a result of shifting to a virtual private yoga practice, I’ve watched Kelly step into her power and come into her body. Without me physically there to move her props or use my hands to guide her, she’s had to claim agency over her practice in a way that I believe would have happened, had we carried on in-person, but it likely would have taken much longer to get there. One of the most beautiful things she’s cultivated through her practice is a newfound and deepening awareness, which has expanded well beyond the borders of her mat. She regularly tells me that yoga has changed her life. And I’ve been incredibly fortunate to witness her evolution every step, asana, and deep breath along the way.

So without further ado, here’s the top ten lessons I learned from Kelly, my first private yoga student, and my forever teacher:

10 Lessons I Learned From My First Private Yoga Student

1.) Sometimes a session is simply the sacred space you create for your client to talk and for you to listen.

2.) If you keep at it, yoga will change your life.

3.) Spinal undulations just before lowering into pigeon pose are basically really slow mermaid hair flips.

4.) When cueing barrel rolls from tabletop, it’s important to clarify that the imaginary barrel is lying on its side.

5.) The body really does keep the score. And yoga is one way to move through it.

6.) Less is usually more.

7.) You can’t say, “it’s ok to rest” enough.

8.) Learning how to be present for someone is more important than anything you’ll learn in a teacher training.

9.) Witnessing someone come home to their body is fucking awesome.

10.) Virtual private yoga is a potent, empowering, transformative practice.

Thanks so much for reading! If you’re interested in starting a private yoga practice with me, I’d love to connect with you. Send me a note and we’ll schedule your complimentary 30-minute Discovery Call. It’ll give us time to talk about what you’re looking for and see if we’re a good fit.